Jenny's story

Jenny, 54 from Angus, shares the difference Thistle made during a very difficult period.

I was going through a period where I really needed some help with my mental health. I’d read about all the delays to mental health support, and I knew I wasn’t somebody who would immediately be put at the top of the list, yet I knew I needed to speak to someone

I have chronic, long-term pain which leaves me housebound, meaning that during the pandemic I couldn’t have people to visit. I’d speak with my friends on the phone, but I was going downhill mentally, missing physical company so much. I could feel myself heading to a place I hadn’t been for a while.

Nine years ago, I was working as a receptionist when I stopped being able to type. They thought it was repetitive strain injury, then tendonitis – I had all these operations which didn’t do anything to help. I was also dealing with psychological damage inflicted by my boss. I put everything into my work, so it was an incredibly hard time. Eventually I was medically retired. I later found out that I had spinal stenosis, but they couldn’t operate because my spine had started crumbling in and amongst my nerves, meaning there was too great a risk of accidental paralysis. I also have osteoarthritis in both knees, as well as nerve pain and fibromyalgia. The pain never goes away.

I hadn’t had much success with accessing support for my mental health previously. I’d had medical professionals tell me they expected my depression to be ‘getting better’ because some positive things had recently happened in my life. I never thought I’d have to explain to a nurse that my depression wasn’t down to my daily circumstances. On another occasion I started going to counselling only to have the practitioner tell me they were looking forward to writing about me for their thesis.

I can’t remember how I came across Thistle, and I didn’t know exactly what kind of support it was, but I just really felt that whatever they could offer was worth trying.

It turned out to be a lifeline.

I started off having one-to-one calls with a Health and Wellbeing Practitioner. She never made me feel like there were people worse off than me, which is something that was always on my mind when I thought about seeking support. I spent a lot of that first phone call in tears, because I couldn’t believe that somebody wanted to know about what I was going through, wanted to help me. She wasn’t just someone at the end of a phone with a list of questions on a piece of paper; I could tell that she really wanted to find out what I needed and what she could help me with. I would talk through what was going on in my head, and with a bit of prompting here and there she would make me realise that I had the answers all along, that, ‘– hang on a minute, yeah, I can do this!’ It was just fantastic for somebody to have faith in you, without even having met you. If you could bottle up empathy then open the bottle and send it down the phone, that was her.

I then went on a Lifestyle Management course with another practitioner who was just as wonderful. I started to feel more mentally balanced and could see my outlook on life changing. With the help of the tools we learned on the course, I began to notice that my ability to adapt to stressful situations was changing, and I can now see that my thoughts have been changed permanently. It took a while, but you remember the things you learn. Having the Lifestyle Management manual as well was so helpful, as I could go back over it whenever I want. It’s a great tool.

I’ve since attended the Eating Well course, and am looking forward to the mindfulness course. Whenever I hear about a new course, I sign myself up for it because I’ve got so much out of the support at Thistle. I’ve made so many friends through the courses as well – real, proper friends. We all have our different problems, but we all come together with understanding and empathy for each other. There’s a lot of letting go in the courses at Thistle, and I mean that in the best way possible.

Without that initial phone call from Thistle, I wouldn’t be where I am today. Everything I’ve achieved over this past year and a half is the culmination of that first call. If I hadn’t reached out, right now I’d be phoning the doctor and asking for more and more tablets, trying to find something to just make me feel a bit better. Instead, I’m experiencing and expressing joy for the first time in years. This has been the start of something really, genuinely life changing.

If you’re even considering coming to Thistle for support, for goodness’ sake, do it. You’ve got nothing to lose – and when you come, you’ll want to stay. Before I got in contact with Thistle, I didn’t know about the kindness I’d experience here, the feeling of being enveloped with love and warmth, being placed in your own little personal bubble of joy – which expands when you join groups and start making friends, if that’s what you want.

Learning through love and laughter is amazing. You don’t think you’re learning when you’re having fun, but you are, and that alleviates the pain as well. I’d attended pain management groups for years, and in comparison, everything felt so rigid. They all felt like being in a cold room, whereas Thistle is a warm, welcoming room. I was so stunted in other groups, and I just wish more people knew about Thistle and how different it is.

I wasn’t on the dark side, but I was heading down, below my baseline. Now I’m above that line. In fact, I’ve got a new baseline now, another ring in my tree trunk. And that line is permanent. I know there will be dips in the future, but I’m confident I can cope with them now.

I’m so happy I found Thistle.